The second Tuesday of October is National Face your Fear Day. This Tuesday just gone, the 8th October was that day. Did you realise that it was a day to do something different? If so, what did you do that was different? Did you face a fear?
Sometimes, we all let thoughts stop us doing things. We worry that things might go wrong so we don’t try. The trouble with this is that we become safe and comfortable but our world and our experiences can become smaller and smaller. But the problem is that by becomng comfortable we are not growing, challenging ourselves to be better. If we can push ourselves to do something that makes us uncomfortable, we can show ourselves what we can achieve.
I’m not suggesting that you need to jump out of a plane, although people who have done it have said that it is amazing and makes you realise that if you do that you can literally do ANYTHING!
What I’m suggesting is that you take some time to notice what you are not doing – like changing job, moving house, ending a relationship that isn’t giving you what you need. And then start to think about what you would really like to do and what is stopping you.
Those examples above are the big decisions, those things that are bound to give people a fair old bout of fear. And often people do make those decisions, after a little wobble! But what about when fear stops you doing the small things?
Not going out to the post office for fear of seeing a dog,
Not going to that party you’ve been invited to for fear of feeling left out and alone
Avoiding a job promotion for fear of having to do presentations.
There are lots of examples of fear holding people back from experiences, from living life to the full, from being their best self. But how can this change? There are some hints and tips that can help.
• Be kind to yourself.
Don’t be harsh on yourself when you find that you’re struggling. Think about how you would talk to a friend who was struggling with something similar. I’m sure you’d be kind and supportive. Be kind and supportive to yourself. Speak to yourself in that same way.
I know this sounds a bit strange but honestly, if you concentrate on your breathing and slow your breathing down, it can help you to think more clearly.
• Change your ‘What if’s’
For every negative ‘what if this might happen’ write down a positive what if. It really is amazing how quickly you can learn to think about one or two positive what if’s that help you to change the way you think.
• Imagine being in a happy, calm place.
Imagination is such a powerful tool, and if you can imagine taking yourself to a place that is calm and peaceful, it can help you to remain calm. That then helps you to think more calmly and rationally.
Taking yourself out for a walk is one of the best medicines that anyone can take. Exercise of any type is good for you and walking helps you to clear the mind and come up with a really great solution to the problem that you have been dealing with. Open spaces and breathing have been shown to really help with this process.
If you think that you aren’t living your best life, and feel you need more help that the suggestions above, contact me for more information and a discussion about how I might be able to help you to free yourself of fear and live life to the full.